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Julia Stiles – Just Between Friends

Updated: Jul 27, 2023


Julia Stiles stars in “Between Us.”


Julia Stiles

Just Between Friends

by Jay S. Jacobs


Relationships are never easy, however in the movie Between Us, the divisions which can consume a couple are ratcheted up to a spectacular degree. The movie is based on a Joe Hortua play about two couples who were long-time friends. The four meet on two different nights about a year or so apart, just as each relationship is imploding.


It's not exactly easy viewing, but it's even harder to perform. Between Us essentially has four characters in its world. Others pop in and out, but these two couples are the complete focus of the film. Luckily for the filmmakers, they hooked up with four extraordinarily talented actors to do their heavy lifting.


One couple is made up Grace and Carlo, a pairing who start the film as romantically head over heels, only to become bitter combatants when a baby and economic concerns boil over. Grace is played by Julia Stiles, the former teen star who has been in as diverse roles as The Bourne series, 10 Things I Hate About You, a season of Dexter and last year's Oscar favorite Silver Linings Playbook. Carlo is portrayed by the extremely talented theatrical song-and-dance man Taye Diggs of Private Practice, Rent and Chicago.


Their college friends are Sharyl and Joel, a more financially sound duo who snipe at each other mercilessly in their antiseptic Connecticut McMansion only to eventually find a certain amount of common ground through therapy. They are portrayed with great intensity by David Harbour (The Newsroom) and Melissa George (Bag of Bones).


The film shows people at their lowest points, being petty and antagonistic and going out of their way to hurt the people that they supposedly love. It's tough waters for any actor to negotiate. However, even though this look at modern relationships was often quite uncomfortable, Julia Stiles was all in as soon as she read the script.

"That subject matter is my jam," Stiles admits. "Meaning I can't get enough of stories that explore the nature of love, marriage, fidelity and commitment."


The film had a very interesting structure. It kept flipping back in time. In early scenes Grace and Carlo were blissfully in love and happy and Joel and Sharyl were ready to kill each other. In later scenes the second couple has reconciled, and Grace and her husband are miserable.


"One of the things I really liked about the adaptation of the play was that it wasn't chronological," Stiles says. "We were able to rehearse the two time periods separately. We shot in that order too, so that made it easier."


So was it easy to pretend Stiles was coming to hate Diggs?


"He's delightful," Stiles says enthusiastically. "I felt really bad having to yell at him in the later scenes. But that's drama, right?"


Yes, indeed it is drama. Couples – no matter how perfect for each other – are going to hit serious rough spots. Still, seeing two sometimes-perfect couples disintegrating on screen makes it hard to believe that it is possible for a pair to stay blissfully happy together.


"Anything is possible," Stiles acknowledges, "but sometimes the difficulties in a relationship make it stronger and allow the love the get deeper."


One interesting thing about the movie is that it was not even acknowledged that Grace and Carlo were an interracial couple. It makes one wonder if the world has moved to a point that this kind of thing can be just taken as natural.

"I bet there are subtle difficulties, but it certainly isn't stigmatized anymore," Stiles agrees. "Then again, I live in New York."


Still, if she and her husband character were going through a bad stretch, that is nothing compared to the alienation she feels from her old college friends. From the very beginning of the film, Grace appears to have nothing but disdain for Joel and Sharyl. Perhaps there are certain people in life that just push your buttons.


"Yes, but you have to ask yourself why," Stiles says. "Usually when someone angers you or can provoke you easily, you have to look more deeply at why they have that power. I don't think Grace disliked the other couple; I think she was envious."


The movie says some very cynical things both about marriage and about friendship. However, it only seemed natural to Stiles that this particular story would take such an unblinking look at relationships.


"I think the film does have a harsh outlook, but a gentler one wouldn't make for good drama."


Luckily, Stiles didn't have to draw on an actual incident to get into the mindset of Grace. In fact, as an actress who has been working steadily since she was a little girl, Stiles is used to creating these situations from the script and her own ideas.


"I am more fond of using my imagination," she says, "rather than drawing on real experience."


Stiles' imagination has been captured by film since she was a child, so it's no surprise that she worked her way into the world of filmmaking. When she was a little girl, she was having her eyes opened by such iconic films as Desperately Seeking Susan. Psycho. Born on the Fourth of July. Cool Hand Luke and her personal favorite, the comic 1986 film version of the board game Clue, which she says can always make her smile when she is a bad mood.

She also had an eclectic group of actors and artists that whet the appetite to join in this business called show.


"Audrey Meadows, Madonna, Tim Curry," Stiles recalls, "and then when I got older Paul Newman and every actor in every Christopher Guest movie."


As Madonna being in that list suggests, movies are not her only true love. She enjoys music just as much, and sometimes finds it even more moving.


"Music can make me incredibly nostalgic," Stiles says. "I cry more with songs than movies. And on airplanes, so you could pretty much put on anything in an airplane and I'll cry."


Still, all these years later, it amazes her that she makes a living as she does.


"I've been so lucky to make a living being creative, traveling and playing make-believe," Stiles says.


Now having done dozens of roles since she debuted in twenty years ago on the old PBS series Ghostwriter, it's difficult for her to pick a role she feels best represents her work.


"It's really hard to say," Stiles admits. "I actually want a do-over on a lot of them."


One role that would not be set for a do-over would be her season-long arc on the popular Michael C. Hall serial killer drama Dexter. On the show, she played a traumatized kidnapping victim. She was saved from a hardened murderer by Dexter and then joined him to get revenge on her captors.


"I was so spoiled working on that show because I loved what they wrote for me," Stiles says. "It was a delight, especially the kill room scenes."

She also had a large role in last year's Oscar winner Silver Linings Playbook with Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lawrence. Stiles played Lawrence's uptight older sister and was impressed by her young co-star.


"The first thing I noticed about Jennifer is her strength," Stiles says. "She really is unlike any young actress I've met. And she was reading Anna Karenina, which was pretty impressive."


Her character was a bit of a journey for Stiles, though. In fact in her long career, Stiles feels that this role may have been the one that was least like she is in real life.


"It's hard to say how much I inform a character and how much it informs me. I'd say Veronica in Silver Linings was a stretch."


Still, Stiles wanted the role, eventually auditioning for director David O. Russell twice. Her faith in the project was rewarded. The whole cast and crew were pleasantly surprised to find the film did surprisingly well for such a small-budget movie. A few months later, Stiles was out there rooting for her co-stars Cooper, Lawrence and Robert De Niro on Oscar night.


"You can never predict how a movie will be received, particularly one dealing with a difficult subject matter like mental illness," Stiles admits. "I remember really liking the script. It was a good affirmation to have it well received. I was so honored to be a part of that."


Copyright ©2013 PopEntertainment.com. All rights reserved. Posted: July 30, 2013.


Photo Credits:

#1 © 2013. Courtesy of Monterey Media. All rights reserved.

#2 © 2013. Courtesy of Monterey Media. All rights reserved.

#3 © 2013. Courtesy of Monterey Media. All rights reserved.

#4 © 2013. Courtesy of Monterey Media. All rights reserved.

#5 © 2013. Courtesy of Monterey Media. All rights reserved.


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